1. Why? It’s your ex: This is someone you’ve shared a strong connection — physical and otherwise — with in the past. Given the familiarity, comfort level and history, It’s ridiculously easy to fall into his arms (and bed) all over again, especially if you are (or your ex is) at a difficult relationship stage and feeling all vulnerable.
Why not? It’s your ex: Remind yourself that you split for a reason. Jog your (selective) memory and list all the things he did that made you want to scream. In pain not pleasure. It’s all the more pointless because you’ll only ruin the past (memories), present (your marriage) and future (what are the chances of you hooking up with your ex again?).
2. Why? You’re bored: A while after any relationship, particularly a domestic one like a live-in or a marriage, the romance is bound to go flying out of the window. You’ll soon get (too) comfy around each other, especially after experiencing parenthood, which could be a good thing or not.
Why not? The grass is always greener on the other side: You may feel super jealous of your single friends and their so-called colourful lives, but they’d probably give an arm and a leg to be in your steady shoes. Don’t mess up a beautiful marriage for a few minutes of clandestine pleasure.
3. Why? You think he’s cheating on you: You find him increasingly secretive, glowing with boyish charm and contentment and strangely guilty at the same time? If you’ve spotted (m)any of these classic signs, coupled with a rumour or two, you could well be tempted to have a little fling of your own to make him jealous.
Why not? Even if he’s indeed having an affair, what’s the point of “taking revenge” to give him a taste of his medicine? Instead, confront him. Talk it out. And then decide accordingly.
4. Why? Your husband’s too busy: He’s never done so much overtime, gone to work on weekends and taken off on too many business trips. He’s hardly around, so why not fool around a little behind his back? You’ve got a sex drive too.
Why not? If you really think he’s way too busy, ask yourself why. It’s probably so that the two of you (and the kids you intend you have) can lead a more comfortable life. As for your sex drive, bring out your inner goddess to turn him on. Like never before.
5. Why? Sex has become banal: There was a point when the two of you couldn’t keep your hands off each other. You ripped each other clothes off and had sex twice a day (or at least once). However, there’s such a predictable pattern to your bedroom behavior now that you’re just not inclined to do it with him. As opposed to the new hottie you’ve been eyeing.
Why not? It’s normal. For your bedroom activities to fall into a pattern, that is. Not jumping into the sack with someone else just for the novelty factor. Follow these tips instead to relive your honeymoon phase.
6. Why? Sex has always been banal: He’s always been below average between the sheets. Only the first time was special, because it was… well, the first time.
Why not? It’s your “fault” too. What’s that they say about it taking two to tango? It’s easy to blame him for not knocking you out of your senses with multiple orgasms, but what have you been bringing to the bedroom department? If he’s really that disastrous in bed, here’s are some quick fixes.
7. Why? He won’t find out: He either trusts you blindly or simply lives in a shiny, happy little bubble.
Why not? You don’t commit a crime simply for the pleasure of going scot-free. Instead, think of all the people you know with possessive, obsessive partners, heave a sigh of relief, thank your stars and return the favour.
8. Why? You’re in the MILF stage: Getting older invariably means gray hair, wrinkles, sagging and cellulite. You’re feeling increasingly unattractive, and your hubby’s getting paunchier and balder too. When out of nowhere surfaces a toy boy with MILF fantasies about you.
Why not? You’re just a novelty: You’re sure to feel used later on because the fling is going to end soon, once the kid’s learnt a few things from you. You’re definitely putting your marriage in jeopardy, with nothing (nobody) solid to fall back on. Can’t you think of less-complicated ways to flatter yourself?